Marilou's reflections: Hope

This week has certainly been one filled with not so good news ... I always do my best to see the positive in things and do believe that yes, everything happens for a reason. I admit, when I learned that Ahnung has an aggressive form of breast cancer I felt somewhat lost. I felt like I simply couldn't take another blow ... for a couple years now, it has felt like I have been knocked down over and over again, but I remember my swimming coach telling me as a kid ... "it's not about winning ... it's not about the gold ... it's about getting back up, over and over again..." And so that's what I've done. I've had my own personal health issues to contend with over the past couple of years. Somehow, i'm able to take those in stride. The kicker and the real test is this latest blow ... aggressive cancer to my precious Ahnung. And along with this latest diagnosis, I find myself swarming again in a pool of uncertainty with a new palpable mass appearing in my left breast. But my health issues .... I can deal with those. Ahnung's health issues and the possibility that I may not have her around much longer ... now that's an entirely different story!

I am going to remain hopeful though about my sweet girl. Both Vicki (my friend and vet who did the surgery) and Ahnung's vet at Lake Harriet Veterinary have said that I caught this very early and acted very quickly. Most aren't this lucky. For many dogs (and cats) the cancer has metastasized before it is even caught. Vicki and Dr. Jim Sinning both have told me that I caught it extremely early. I check my girl every day. She loves to lay on her back and get her belly rubbed so not a day goes by where she doesn't get belly rubs from me. So last Thursday night at 9:30 pm when she chose to roll over on her back instead of joining her siblings Missy and Mister in going potty in the backyard I did the customary, get down on my knees next to her, whisper sweet things in her ears and rub her belly :) I noticed a couple large connected lumps. I immediately called my friend Vicki who texted me back and told me to bring her into her clinic the next day. By Monday she was in surgery and having the entire mass removed. The fact that her chest x-rays are clear indicates that there is no obvious spread of cancer to her lungs yet. The vets also can't feel her lymph nodes ... another positive sign that the cancer hasn't spread. The pathology report says that they see no indication of the cancer spreading into her blood system. So yes, there are a lot of unknowns yet .... we are walking on uncertain ground but we will make it through no matter what and we will hold onto hope .... we meet with the oncologist on Tuesday morning, and at that time we will be given more information ... with the support of friends we will walk through this together, and it will be okay. I have to believe that. When I look into the eyes of Ahnung who is so full of life, the only thing I can do is smile. She is pure love ... pure, unconditional love and she is a gift to me and to so many.

I want to thank all my friends for your continued support and words of encouragement and your prayers. It means so much to us.

Ahnung is having the time of her life right now ... she's getting lots of rest, lots of love, lots of treats and lots of snuggle time with mom, mom's friends and her siblings. Please continue to keep my sweet girl in your thoughts and prayers.

"Hope: Better to light the candle than to curse the darkness"