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A 5K-9 walk with my girl in 2010 |
The oncologist spent a long time with us .... it is clear we are in the final stretch of this amazing walk we have had. I look into Ahnung's eyes and I know she is not ready to go today. The sparkle is still in her eyes, her tail still wags, she still perks up for treats .... There is significant fluid in her abdomen but the oncologist said it doesn't appear to be causing her any discomfort. She still doesn't have any trouble with her breathing despite the massive size tumors in her lungs. The oncologist says it could be days, it could be weeks, maybe even longer. We don't know if the fluid has been slowly building up or her body just said enough. She told us the next few days would tell us more. She recommended increasing her tramadol ... as we have both learned in our volunteer work in hospice, it is now about pain management and comfort. Her temperature is normal, her heart sounds good .. quite frankly, the oncologist said Ahnung is doing amazingly well considering what the x-rays show. The oncologist said it's also possible Ahnung may just pass her in her sleep. To be honest, it wouldn't surprise me if she did that ... I have always imagined my sweet girl living life fully all the way until the very end.
I know the time is approaching. It will soon be her time to move on to her next job ... when it is time for her to move on, she will let me know.
Hanging out at a coffee shop this morning |
Dear Ahnung, I promise to listen to your heart and to your spirit and your soul. I promise to do all I can do to keep you comfortable and free from pain, and when you tell me it is time to set your spirit free, I promise to hold you, kiss you and wrap your essence and your being around me, and to let you go. I have been blessed to have you in my life .... and as we approach what appears to be the end of this Final Walk, I will imagine that when we get to that cliff, a community of people who love you dearly will set your spirit free and you will soar into the heavens. I am grateful today is not that day ... and I will cherish every moment left that I have with you.
We had originally planned to have a 3rd Celebration of Life party for Ahnung on September 29th ... well, we are moving up her big party to this Sunday, August 23, 2013. My dear friend Merry will once again lead a healing prayer circle. Ahnung has returned every morning to lay by the healing river rocks ... my hope is that with renewed energy and prayers from a community of friends who love and support her that I will blessed to have her for weeks, even months to come ... Please join us for her party on Sunday, August 23rd at 3 pm at the Animal Humane Society in Golden Valley (we will be in the large auditorium by the adoption center).
Marilou, I am so touched by the way you honor Ahnung and her journey. Sending you blessings and Harmony.
ReplyDeleteYou both have done such a good job, Marilou. Nung-nung has had a productive life that's an inspiration. Blessings to both of you!
ReplyDeleteI am praying for both of you.
ReplyDeleteso sorry -it rekindles my recent loss and helps to feel we are not alone in this.
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