Tuesday, March 12, 2013

The wisdom of Ahnung

Air mattress set up so I could sleep by Ahnung

It’s been amazing to witness the wisdom of Ahnung. She slept hard last night (we woke up a couple times so I could give her meds). It was music to my ears to hear her breathe and snore. We will have another slumber party tonight … amazing how well I slept on the air mattress. I guess it’s because I was near my girl.  Ahnung has been intentional about how much she moves. It’s as if she knows she needs to rest to let her body heal. She’s been sleeping on her Martha Stewart bed in the kitchen .. close access to food, to the back door and a prime spot to see all that’s happening. She normally rotates beds in the house so the fact she is only sleeping on the blue bed is an intentional choice. And twice yesterday she got up to move to the living room to lay and sleep by the healing river rocks from her Celebration of Life party. Her little brother Legacy misses playing with her. This morning he dropped his tug toys by her and stood over her. That normally initiates play but Ahnung simply let her little brother be near her. He didn’t do his usual yanking on her leg.  It’s as if I could hear her communicate with her little brother …. I’m here. I love you but I need to rest.
My sweet girl this morning

And recently I’ve noticed a new lump. But I’m due for my 6 month check up with my surgeon and MRI in April so I’ve been disregarding it. I know my health journey and Ahnung’s health journey are so interconnected. Ahnung has a powerful way of communicating with me and getting my attention. While she was resting comfortably yesterday it gave me time to pause and reflect. I picked up the phone and called my doctor’s office. Tomorrow I go in to see my doctor to get the lump checked out.

Today she continues to rest comfortably. We feel blessed to have such a community of love and support around us.

I know we are on our final walk. Despite the largest tumor in her lungs growing by almost 50% since the end of December, she shows no symptoms of the cancer metastasizing her lungs. Her breathing is normal. Her latest blood work was normal. Her lymph nodes are normal. She continues to surprise her doctors that she has no symptoms from the cancer … but that’s my miracle girl :) If we can continue to manage the pain from her back arthritis and luxating patella, we will continue to keep walking this final walk and we will continue to explore with child-like curiosity the wonders, mysteries and magic that lies in front of us every moment …


Marilou & Ahnung (aka nung-nung)

Legacy misses playing with his sister
Sleeping by the basket of river rocks

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