Thursday, June 4, 2009
Terrain of Curiosity and Intention
Over the past couple days I have come to realize I am embarking on a new journey. My health findings have been diagnosed and called "atypical hyperplasia" by conventional medicine and western society. The eastern way and the more alternative way simply says my life is out of balance. Both ways are valid. Both ways are important to listen to.
The bottom line is I have cells in my body that have started to go haywire -- cells that have broken from the norm and the uniform pattern of "normal" cells. Cells that could have a good likelihood of progressing to cancer. One approach focuses on how do I get rid of these cells? Another begs the question: what is causing my cells to go haywire? In the book "Anti cancer: A new way of Life" by Dr. Servan-Schreiber he writes "Cancer lies dormant in all of us. Like all living organisms, our bodies are making defective cells all the time. That's how tumors are born. But our bodies are also equipped with a number of mechanisms that detect and keep such cells in check."
As I was meditating this morning I realized I am blessed. I am blessed to have been given the gift of this "wake up call." I have been running so hard and so fast these past few years, trying to do so much, that I have let my life get out of balance.
It is time to listen to my body. Something is not "right". I have been fighting fatigue for quite some time now. My body and my mind have been fighting because "there's too much to do." I have lost 27 pounds in the past 9 months ... "unexplained weight loss." It's not truly "unexplained" -- simply something I have chosen not to pay attention to, till now. My fatigue has progressively gotten worse. The blessing of my "wake up call" has made me realize I have to slow down. I have to start listening to the wisdom of life's messages being tossed at me ... they begin as gentle messages and continue to escalate until we hear them.
I don't know why my cells have gone awry. I don't know why I've been so fatigued and why i've lost so much weight. Today ... I'm choosing to view this as a new and exciting journey. I'm choosing to embrace both the eastern and western ways. I have learned -- there is no one way. There are many ways and many paths.
With curiosity I will explore a new terrain and I will nurture and embrace health -- health of mind, body, spirit and heart. After years away I returned to see my acupuncturist yesterday. I recommit to complete and total health by paying attention to what I surround myself with and what I allow to enter into my body (nutritionally) and my mind and spirit. I commit to opening my heart and stepping into an exciting new terrain, with curiosity and purposeful intention and attention.
I am grateful for the gift of the wake up call.