I close out this year with a heart full of gratitude for all who have touched my life and my heart in so many ways. We are all connected ... I am especially grateful for my dear friend Laura who has opened up her heart and her home to me as I have gone through a very painful transition and the ending of a long-term relationship. In exactly two weeks I close on my new home. It will mark the beginning of my next phase in my life's journey. I will continue to work on healing myself ... spiritually, emotionally and physically ...
I would like to wish everyone a very Happy New Year! May 2011 bring us joy and happiness ... and when loss and pain touch our lives, I wish for us the courage and strength to move through the pain and to trust that we can get to the other side ...
Now I Become Myself
by May Sarton
Now I become myself. It's taken
Time, many years and places;
I have been dissolved and shaken,
Worn other people's faces,
Run madly, as if Time were there,
Terribly old, crying a warning,
"Hurry, you will be dead before--"
(What? Before you reach the morning?
Or the end of the poem is clear?
Or love safe in the walled city?)
Now to stand still, to be here,
Feel my own weight and density!
The black shadow on the paper
Is my hand; the shadow of a word
As thought shapes the shaper
Falls heavy on the page, is heard.
All fuses now, falls into place
From wish to action, word to silence,
My work, my love, my time, my face
Gathered into one intense
Gesture of growing like a plant.
As slowly as the ripening fruit
Fertile, detached, and always spent,
Falls but does not exhaust the root,
So all the poem is, can give,
Grows in me to become the song,
Made so and rooted by love.
Now there is time and Time is young.
O, in this single hour I live
All of myself and do not move.
I, the pursued, who madly ran,
Stand still, stand still, and stop the sun!
and thank you Ahnung (her name means 'star' in ojibway) for continuing to be my north star and guiding me through the night skies as we move through this transition. She's been busy doing her work as a therapy dog by simply being with me. It never ceases to amaze me how healing and powerful the love of our four-legged furry companions can be .... for those of you with furry companions, give them an extra hug (and treat!) as we welcome the New Year!!!